a summer reflection

Ahhhhh, this picture just says peace.  It was taken in May.  And I feel like it's been that long since we've had a peaceful moment like this.

 

 

Taylor was so excited to bring her bible home for the summer and was determined to make it through the Gospels like her principal challenged them to do.  I'll just be completely honest with you...there hasn't been much Gospel reading this summer. 

 

 

 But it was nice to go back and look at these pictures.  I remember going out to snap pictures of her, and the boys playing. They were all doing their own thing.  Everyone was content. It was a near perfect scene.  Summer had just begun and we were so ready for a nice relaxing schedule. We were ready to sleep in and play and stay up late and be outside all day. 

 

 

And then Summer happened.

 

But if I stare at these pictures long enough the peace and unity and happy and content hearts will all come back right?

 

I remember when a certain baby was happy to run and play outside with his big brother and sister, and everyone got along so good.

 

I remember when I could sit and eat breakfast and load the dishwasher and put a load of laundry in, and everyone did okay while I was occupied.

 

 

May was only 2 months ago, but it seems like forever ago when I think about how different things are around here.  Isn't it funny how with little ones (probably big ones too), you can move from stage to stage so quickly.  Just when things are going good and you feel like you are moving in the right direction, life throws me into a 180 degree turn and we head in the opposite direction.

 

Man, I sound like we've had an awful summer.  HELLO!??!  Disney World, a Caribbean Cruise - not awful one bit!  AMAZINGLY AWESOME!

What I am saying is that where we stand today, is a totally different place we were at 2 months ago. And while I wouldn't give up ANY of the memories we made this summer, I do wish it was much easier than it is to bounce back to normal routines and behaviors.

 

There's no way it could be contributed to the fact that we came home from one vacation and left 2 weeks later for another, right?

Or the fact that Gavin was away from his family for half of the month, and then 5 more days on top of that, away from Mommy.

I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that we are all exhausted and recovering.  Or maybe that's just me.

 

The baby I had back in May didn't climb out of his crib and bang on his bedroom door as hard as he can while screaming at the top of his lungs for me.

The big kids I had back in May started their summer off so well with chores every morning, daily reading and bible time.

The mommy back in May was THRILLED to have her kids home for the summer.

 

The baby I had back in May didn't yell at me all day long and insist I hold him, carry him, hold his hand, and not leave the room to eat, go to the bathroom or retrieve anything.

The big kids I had back in May weren't bored yet.

The mommy back in May didn't lose her patience and yell so much.

 

The baby I had back in May didn't wake up at 6:30am and was still taking naps twice a day.

The big kids I had back in May weren't so mouthy and argumentative, and obeyed much quicker.

The mommy back in May wasn't dreaming of an entire weekend ALONE, in a hotel room.

 

 

I don't think it's a coincidence that one of our favorite songs around here is this one right now.

 The kids play it on my phone, on the iPad, we hear it on Pandora, in the car, one of them is always listening to it on their mp3 players, and multiple times a day someone in the family is singing it aloud to themselves.

 

Lord, I come, I confess,

bowing here, I find my rest.

 

Rest.  I feel like I'm soooo stuck on how tired I am, how drained I am, me, me, me, that it's easy to forget that I need to find my rest in Him.

 

Without you, I fall apart

You're the one that guides my heart

 

I'm definitely falling apart.  I am worn out, my patience has run dry.

I'm short with my kids and my husband. 

My time with the Lord has been lacking ever since we left for the first vacation.

Why do I forget so quickly that I can't do this alone. He will give me grace all along the way, and He will change me when I think I'm unchangeable...if I just stay near.

 

Lord I need you, Oh, I need you

Every hour I need you

My one defense

My righteousness

Oh God, how I need you.

 

Every hour. Sometimes every minute. He is there, but too often I try to control my own day.

Ha, who am I kidding.  I mean, I try, but usually it spins out of control instead. 

And then I find myself fighting a losing battle with my own hands.  When I should be calling on Him as my only defense.

 

Where sin runs deep, your grace is more

Where grace is found, is where you are

Where you are, Lord I am free

Holiness is Christ in me.

 

I can beat myself up about my failures, my mistakes, my attitude or I can choose to run to Him and live in his grace.  Every day is new.  Every day I get a chance to start over. Because He's always waiting for me.

 

Our summer isn't any different than other busy seasons of life. It's not any different than other families with vacations and kids out of school, and new routines, or the lack thereof.

But it's been a reminder to me that sometimes life and kids and homes and work are just too much for me to take care of alone.

I need Him. And I get to proud and too confident, and too busy, that I forget that sometimes.

I get so consumed with how frustrated I am that my one year old is taking me back into that oh-so-exhausting-stage that I remember being drained by with the other kiddos as well.

I get selfish with my time and my own agenda.  I forget to ask for help and I forget to ask for the One who created me to change me when I need changed.

 

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest"

Matthew 11:28

 

I'm thankful He is always a loving and faithful and patient teacher.

 

 

Whew, now that I got all of that out, hopefully I'll get around to sharing our cruise pictures soon!

 

T-ball

Yay for another sport that the kids can be on the same team and Daddy can coach!

And it was even more fun having all the neighborhood kids on the same team too (and lots of friends from school).



 

 It's not T-ball if you don't see players writing in the dirt or taking a seat to rest when they're in the outfield.

 

 

Mason was super fun to watch.  Especially when he ran the bases.  He never ran the straight line to the base.  He took the widest, longest curved path possible, almost looking like he was headed for the dugout.  But he always knew where he was going.

 

  

Don't let this little cheerleader fool you.  He sat and watched and cheered for a few minutes for only ONE game.  The rest of the games he didn't understand why he couldn't be out on the field or in the dug out with everyone else.  Let's just say it was pretty hard for me to sit and actually get to watch much of the games.

 

 

And the best part is that we are done before the extreme heat of the summer.

hollywood studios, epcot, & pretty much a miracle

We spent another half day finishing up everything we hadn't done at Magic Kingdom. If you're making future plans I would say that you really need 2 full days in Magic Kingdom.  We did a 1.5 at a pretty fast pace. Then the plan was to head straight to Hollywood Studies for the second half of the day.   Everyone with Premier could come into Hollywood Studios at 4 to enjoy the park and be there for a big dinner that night.

 

But at lunch time our day took a bad turn.

 

Dave asked me where our cash card was (the $700 gift card that I had gotten from Premier and a pretty big deciding factor in going on this trip).

I had no idea. He insisted that I was the last person to have it, so I checked my purse and insisted that I wasn't the last person to have it.  Neither of us could find it anywhere, but Dave wondered if it could be back in the hotel room.  Our moods were a little down, but we were counting on finding it.  Instead of going straight to Hollywood Studios we made a detour to the resort to look for it.

It was no where.

And then during our search, it hit me that I was the last one to have it.  And I remembered that it was loose in my hand the night before, along with a box of pizza, plates and napkins.  It must of slipped out and I didn't realize since I was carrying so many other things. I was carrying in my hand instead of my purse so I could give it right back to Dave.

I burst into tears.  I knew it was gone.

 

We checked with lost & founds, called the card company, made other phone calls and tried to accept that our $550 that was still on the card was gone.  My stomach was in knots, all I wanted to do was throw a big pity party and cry, and I pretty much did. All I could think about was how much this was going to mess up our entire trip budget and cause us to have to pull money from our cruise budget - ultimately affecting not just that trip, but 2 trips.  I definitely let my attitude go negative really fast.  I wanted to pack up and go home, I didn't want to go to the Hollywood Studios party that night or talk to anyone.  I was just sure that if I had to talk to anyone, it would be hard to hide how depressed I was feeling and I'd just end up crying all night.  After I was all done with my emotional wreck, I came to my senses and tried to pull it together for the kids, and told them all we could do was pray. 

We prayed that the right person would find it and turn it in and that some how we would get it back.

I prayed for peace as I tried to accept it was really gone, and tried so hard to trust that God works out all details.  He knew who had it, he knew if it was going to help them more than us, he knew how our trip would turn out regardless.

 

We walked back over our tracks from the night before and even talked to the people at the pizza shop. My tears earned me a free piece of chocolate cake. Ha! 

 

I really really didn't want to go to Hollywood Studios where everyone we knew would be. My face was tear-stained and I just had no energy to talk to anyone.  But my wise sister-in-law reminded me that we needed the free dinner more than ever at this point.  So we went.

 

We had a few hours to explore the park before the Premier event started. So we watched a stunt show, which of course had a nice surprise for Mason!  Lightning McQueen came out of the white truck beside him, and Mason's eyes lit up like no other.

 

 

We were all the way at the top of the stadium when they called for a volunteer from the audience.  When they pulled a boy from the audience out and asked him his name we realized it was our nephew Jaden!  We cheered loud for him!

 

 

Our black shirts kind of took over the park.

 

 

We met back in the stadium where the stunt show was for a quick presentation from our president and event coordinators.  It was so fun for the kids to get to see the big group they were a part of, and it was so sweet to have them stand up and cheer and gives hugs to their mamas who worked so hard to earn this trip for them.

 

It was here that God answered our prayers, in front of 4000 people.

When our event coordinator took the microphone and joked around about "So who here has lost their $700 cash card!?!?"  I didn't find it all that funny when lots of people jumped up and down jokingly in hopes they were going to be giving one away (like they had done the first night with a few $200 cash cards).

But then I heard my name.

"Amanda Balzer...we have your card right here! Come and get it!" 

I screamed and everyone around me screamed too.  And because we were in the VERY top row, I got to walk down all of those stairs in front of lots of people feeling so incredibly blessed. I caught several glances as I walked down the isle, faces that all looked just as relieved & excited for me as I was for myself.

 

We sat there in shock.  Still not really believing that card was back in our hands. We have no idea who found it, or where they found it or how it got back into the hands of the head Premier people.

But that little bitty card was an extreme example to our kids of answered prayers. I had a friend on Facebook say "and that may be the exact reason that the Lord took you on this trip!"  That lesson and the memories of losing and getting that card back will be in our minds far after we forget what rides we rode and what characters we met.

 



 

After dinner we enjoyed more of the park before it closed.  My sweet Premier great grandma (we're all one big happy family in Premier :-) and her husband from Virginia took the kiddos for ice cream and hung out with them for awhile, so that Dave and I could get in line for the Rockin' Roller Coaster.  It was one of the only rides that neither of the kids were tall enough to ride, but the one ride that we heard was a must.  It was a nice 30 minute break from the kids.  And the picture and sweet note we got later about our kiddos brought tears to my eyes.

 

 

For the record, all 4 of us rode the Hollywood Tower or Terror, and I'm pretty sure all 4 of us were scared to death.

There were no tears or complete terror from anyone.  We all screamed and laughed in the moment.  But afterwards, we were in pretty strong agreement that it was the scariest one of the whole trip. 

 

 Our trip came to an end on Father's Day.  It was not in any way a relaxing day for Dave, but we tried to at least do what he wanted to do that day.

 

So it was off to Epcot.

 

 Our original plans didn't include Epcot at all.  We knew it wasn't as appealing to the little kids.  But we decided to check it out after hearing there were at least 2 or 3 things there our kids would love.  Out of those 2 or 3, we did one of them.  The lines for the others were way too long.  After just a couple of hours, we were out of there.

 

And on to ride the Monorail (we had only taken bus transportation but Dave really wanted to ride on the Monorail to see more of the entire Disney World property and other resorts).  Around lunch time we headed to Downtown Disney, a shopping and eating district, and a Father's Day weekend car show.

 

We had a seafood (and hotdog) lunch, free samples at Ghirardelli, we sweated our booties off, stopped in LEGOLAND, and finally did some shopping for souvenirs.

 

 

 

Oh, and we saw the real Lightning McQueen again and Mater.  You could stand in line to get a picture just like all the other characters at the other parks, but Mason didn't want to.  He settled for a picture with Lightning in the background.

 



 

 

For 4 days the kids thought hard about the one thing they wanted to buy the most.  They had both been settled on Mickey and Minnie pillow pets the entire time.  And then in the last minute they both found something else they liked more.  Taylor got a baby Minnie, Mason got Stitch (he has slept with him every night since) and they picked out a Pluto pillow pet for Gavin.

 



The next morning our alarm went off at 4:30am. Total yuck!

The good thing was we were home by 1pm.  (supposed to be home by 11am but a weather delay set us back).  There was A LOT more sleeping on the trip home than there was on the way there.

 



 

We all missed our little Gavin soooo much!  The kids even missed him so much that a few times they said they wanted the trip to be over so we could go home to him. He did great with Mema and then Nana and Papa.  I don't think he even knew we were gone.

 

 And that's the end of Disney.  What a treasure it was to spend 5 days with our kiddos here.

Thank you Premier.

Thank you to everyone who supported my business from August 2012-March 2013.

Thank you Dave for cheering me on right down to the very last points that came in.

It was truly a magical vacation.  And we are truly thankful.

More Disney {Animal Kingdom}

Day 3 of our Disney trip started off with a Character Breakfast at our resort.  Lots of characters came to the resort just for Premier's group.  The lines to see them were still long but they were much better (and cooler) than at the parks.  It was a nice little treat.  It was still a good thing the kids weren't all that into it, so we didn't have to stand in line after line.  They chose 2 lines and then were done.

The night before is when they had met Mickey, and as fun as it would have been to get a picture with Mickey and Minnie together, they were happy enough just seeing them walk through.

 

 

Aunt Stef surprised them all with Mickey and Minnie shirts to wear together!

Premier fed us breakfast every day (except the two days we were there in addition to the Premier trip).  It was so nice to be able to fill our tummies full before heading to the parks...for free!

The other mornings we had cereal in our room.  This is a huge tip for anyone planning a Disney trip in the future...take as much breakfast food as you can and eat before you head out.

 



And it was off for Animal Kingdom.

 

 

Animal Kingdom has a handful of rides, but not as much as Magic Kingdom. It's pretty much a zoo on steroids.  And it has lots more shade than Magic Kingdom.

 

 

 

We loved the Mt. Everest rollercoaster!  This was the other one that Mason couldn't do, so we had a few meltdowns, but he found a few other things to make up for it.

 

 

And there were parades, just like Magic Kingdom.

I heard that the staff at Disney said this was the hottest June they've had in a long time.  I don't how the characters survived those costumes.  We were drenched of sweat all afternoon.

 

 

A 45 minute break in the air conditioning was amazing.  And so was the Lion King show. I heard it was very much like the Broadway version of The Lion King.

 Mason was petting a snake, and I stayed on the other side of the glass.

 

Seriously, that stroller was the best thing ever.

 



It's funny that my kids love twists and turns and drops on roller coasters, but when dinosaurs that look like they are coming down to eat you are involved, they weren't too impressed.

I love this picture of all of us.

  This was the only ride they kids did not want to ride again the entire trip.

 I think I'll have one more post for you and a pretty cool story too!

Surely I can get it done before we head off for vacation #2!