we're still here

Well, that was a long blogging break.  I hadn't intended to take a break, but it's just what happens sometimes. But we're still here.  And all is well.

 

Here's a little recap of what's been going on:

 

 

We've had some beautiful January weather.  I am still holding out for some beautiful winter weather, but I like the beautiful spring-like weather too.  Especially when all 3 of these kiddos can get out and get some fresh air.

 

 
I don't think I've really done an update on Gavin since he was a year old.  Man, that's already been 2 months ago.  But I'll do one soon.

But for now, I'll just tell you that this kid loves to be outside.  He will escape if any door is left open.   If Dave goes to the garage for fire wood and leaves the door open, Gavin will race as fast as he can to escape out the door.  So you can only guess what a struggle it is to get him inside.

 

 

The kids weren't home today, and it was my day to tackle a big to-do list with no interruptions, but a dumb cold and sinus stuff interrupted it all.  I slept the day away and when I woke up, I still felt like I hadn't slept at all. It's always a big bummer when mom is sick.  And as much as it stinks to feel that way, in some weird way, sometimes it feels nice to have an excuse to not have to get anything done.

Not that I would choose to be sick for that reason. Surely someone else gets what I'm sayin. :-)

 

 

 

 Ha, in my mind I had a lot more to tell you than what I'm coming up with.  I guess that goes to show we really haven't had much going on here lately.  Which I am thankful for.

 



 

I'm really sad that Parenthood is over.  That is the best show ever.  And I love that Dave loves it just as much as I do. Tuesday nights, on the couch with my man, watching our show, were the best nights.  It definitely was getting hard to handle.  I couldn't make it through a single episode without crying...not just tearing up, but usually actual tears falling. 

But American Idol is back.  And I know that is maybe soooo not the cool thing anymore.  But we love it.  Hollywood week is my favorite (which is next week! yay!). 

 





No one ever warns you that the hard life questions from kids start so soon. Like...

why does God want me to go through this?

if something is bad, and people pray for God to make it better, will he change it?

why did Daddy not sign up to be in the army? did he just want to be with his family?

Sometimes I don't even know where the questions comes from.

It's definitely another reminder that as parents we need to know God's character and His truths as solidly as we can, to be able to guide our children through this hard hard life.

 





 

I'm reading Real Moms...Real Jesus by Jill Savage, with my morning bible study group.  I will be completely honest and say that for the first few weeks I skipped my chapters and just went to group and listened. (that's being super honest when I know that some of the gals in my group will read this :-). But lately I've had a big wake up call in some areas of my life and I have been desperate for the Lord to show me his will and direction.  It just amazes me beyond words that he so readily and easily answers when I call. Even when I know that I have been so prideful and unfaithful to Him. 

 

Then you shall call, and the Lord will answer;
You shall cry, and He will say, ‘Here I am.’

Isaiah 58:9

 

Not only has He given me so much direction and peace through his Word, he also convicted me about skipping out on chapters of that book.  It was like He knew better than me, that maybe the book was hitting some exact issues of my life that I was looking for direction in. So I went back and caught completely up.  And even got a bit ahead.  And guess what?  It has hit the nail on soooo many things that I've been struggling with personally.  Go figure.  God knew just what I needed.  His Word will always be the single most important way to know his ways and his truths, but I know that he uses godly authors to speak his truths also. And I'm super thankful for any way that he uses to show me his purpose and direction for my life.

Even when it's a little hard to swallow.

 

 

I had all intentions of starting a Valentine's countdown for the kids, using the same frame and clips we used for our advent calendar.  But it looks like I may be a few days late, as I don't have much prepared yet.  We may just have to play catch up right away.  I'm thinking that each day they will read something that we love about each of them, along with a bible verse about God's love. 

But seriously, how can it be February 1 already?



 

 

And here's a series of pictures that has a funny story.

The kids were playing on the other side of this fence, in our very overgrown, dead garden.

Gavin hung out on this side for the longest time trying to figure out how to get in.  He wants desperately to be where his brother and sister are all the time.

 

 

The kids would come in and out a few times, and close the door fast enough that he couldn't get into where they were.  Not that they were being mean, but none of us thought it was a good idea for him to be playing there.

But he finally got in when Taylor wasn't quick enough.

But was quickly escorted back out and wasn't happy about it at all.  It's just so rough being the baby.
 

 

Well, that's all I have. Nothing too exciting.  Check back soon for some Gavin stories.

hope, heaven and a hero

I know that I use my blog to mostly share our pictures and stories and family memories. Stuff that's not all that meaningful to anyone else but us and possibly our extended family. But I can't help but notice how many people beyond that come here daily. And every so often I get word from someone who says "I've been following your blog for a long time...". It's always so humbling, and I seriously wonder why anyone actually enjoys this blog and the stories and pictures on it, other than the grandmas and grandpas and aunts (and maybe uncles) who read it. But the point is, I don't have to know why. I don't have to do things to try to get people to read. I don't have to post things for any other reason other than I want to. I don't have to post a certain number of times a week, or worry about losing readers if I don't. I have never used this blog as an outlet to be completely transparent and open. Not to be confused with trying to hide certain things either. It was just never my intent with my blog to journal my inner most thoughts and feelings and daily happenings. But that doesn't mean that you don't get that every once in a while. It makes no sense to force anything. And if I'm going to go beyond my usual pictures and stories of our ordinary life, and get more real and vulnerable - I want it to be with purpose and God-inspired. With all of that said, I realize that God has given me a tool that speaks to others. Normally it just speaks to them in a very casual, and non-emotional, "here's the latest of what our kiddos have been up to" kind of way, but I never want to forget that there are people reading my words here whom I may never get to speak to in person. There are people reading these words who may not know Jesus in a real and personal way. And for that reason, when I feel that the Lord is nudging me to share more than just the milestones and birthdays and cute kid pictures, I will. And I hope that's okay with you. And I'm okay with that no matter the thoughts or opinions of others. Because a friend told me once, "it's your blog, you get to do whatever you want on your blog."

 

So with all that said...you can probably guess that this post isn't of the usual.  I've got something way better than that.

 

Last July, at Premier Design's National Convention, I was blessed to get to hear Nick Vujicic speak.  I had never heard of him before, even though he is nationally recognized, but I will never forget the message of hope he brought that day. 

 

This video is being shared on Facebook lately, and I wanted to share it with you.  It's 10 minutes long, I SO hope you'll watch the whole thing.  You can't stop early or you'll miss some of the most powerful parts.  Nick was born with no arms and no legs, quite possibly dealt one of the worst hand of cards in life that anyone could possibly be dealt.  And yet he reminds us all that the most crucial choice we can make in our lives, is to understand by faith that "our Heavenly Father owns all the chips", and that all things comes together for the good for those that love Him. 
 

Our pastor did a sermon this past Sunday on Heaven.  It was a powerful message that left me thinking about the hope of Heaven a lot.  It's painful to think about those who truly believe this world and the hand they've been dealt is all that there is. How do you find purpose and meaning in a world that offers no hope?

My life is full of so many things that are perishable, defiled and fading away. Nothing I have but the faith and hope in my Savior will survive here. Even when I choose not to call it what it is, and repent of it, I experience greed, jealousy, disobedience, selfishness and so much more on a daily basis. I'm ugly. Some days more uglier than others. It's easier to be caddy, and moody with my husband when I want him to know how tough my day was, than it is to be self-less and serve him, expecting nothing in return. I neglect others in my life and ways that I can serve them. My intentions are not always what they should be.  And I try to make it appear like I always have it together. I am insecure about friendships at times. I am selfish with my time. Do you want me to continue? We worry about government and guns, and our children's safety, even when we send them to school. We worry about money and a financial future. We hear about 4 new cancer diagnosis in one day. And then realize the reality that many many more will follow that in the days, months and years to come, wondering if my husband or one of my babies will be one of them.

Even at the age of 31, I am reminded at times that even my body is perishable and fading away. Even something as simple (compared to other things) as migraines remind me that I need the power of God to simply make it through the day sometimes.

We are fallen. This world is fallen. And our hope can be in NOTHING else but the saving blood that was shed for us on the cross.

We can count on everything in this world being taken from us. Sometimes even our most prized and loved possessions - our spouses, or our children. But our hope cannot be taken from us, no matter what.

I was reading in 1st Peter this week and was reminded of this great hope.  Even when everything around us is perishable, defiled and fading away, we are promised that an inheritance awaits us.
Even when our bodies fail, when we hear that diagnosis for the first time, lose that job, don't know how the bills will be paid, are hurt by loved ones, wonder if we're good enough, or watch our children experience pain, 1st Peter reminds us that there is a purpose to our trials.  Our faith will be proven genuine and when we are able to produce good fruit in hard times, all the glory goes to God.

What a great challenge it is to be like Nick. A real-life hero. To praise God for the trials in our lives, and the hand we are dealt.  While these trials remind us that we are weak and fading, they also remind us of the inheritance that is waiting for us.
It's a gift that can't be taken from you.  I hope you've received it, and that your mansion awaits.

celebrating eight

This week in 2005, a humongous ice storm hit Kansas.  It was a bad one, and I can't remember one that bad since.  People were without power for a handful of days.

The storm hit on Tuesday, and on Saturday, January 8, Dave and I were getting married.

I wasn't worried about the weather one bit.  I love winter anyway, and we chose to have a winter wedding, which we definitely got.  (I was only worried about people driving to our wedding)

We wondered if anyone would even come.  But if it was going to be just us and our immediate family, which we honestly thought it could possibly be, I knew it would still be perfect.

 I shared our wedding day "as it happened" on Instagram today.  It was definitely an excessive number of pictures to post in one day, and quite possibly annoyed someone.  But it was fun to remember what we were doing throughout the day, on this day in 2005.

So I'll share a little bit of our story here too, for those of you who don't follow on Instagram.

Maybe you've heard how we met.  But just in case, I'll back you up to that.

We met at the K-State Student Union, over lunch time.  I sat down in a semi-empty area of the Union to eat my Chinese food, and when I cut into my first bite my plastic fork broke, with a pretty loud snap.  It was loud enough for others to hear, so I looked up and around to see if anyone witnessed it, before I slowly got up to go get a new fork. As I stood up, I heard a voice teasingly say,
"I heard that."

And that was the beginning.  My fork broke.  The stranger next to me heard it and decided to actually comment on it.  And a year later he asked me to marry him.

January 8, 2005...

I'll start with a picture from the rehearsal dinner the night before, because it's one of the better ones I have of me and the girls, without having to scan something like I did a lot of the rest.  And yes, I know my hair is very blonde. Way too blonde for me.

 And then we said goodbye.

On our wedding day, a wonderful friend hosted a bridal party luncheon in her home for all of us.  We staggered it so the guys would be out of there before the girls showed up.
 These are all of our groomsmen and ushers.

 The ice was really bad and the church maintenance people told us there was no way they could get the front steps to the main entrance of the church cleaned off.  So they cleaned a side/back door, leaving guests having to walk through the basement of the back of the church and then up some stairs into the lobby to come into the sanctuary.  It was quite the detour.  A few of the ushers went out and tried their hardest to clear the steps so we could try to use them, but they had no luck.  It would have taken them hours and hours.  I had really really wanted to walk down these stairs and have pictures coming out of this beautiful entrance to drive away.  But it wasn't happening.  I think that's the only thing that didn't go as planned (that I know of), so in the end, no big deal.

My favorite moment of the day was seeing each other before the ceremony. I walked down the isle, in the empty sanctuary to meet him. It was just us and the photographer.  It was such a sweet sweet moment.

We had the cutest little ringbearers ever. 

 Dave knew that along with my dream of a winter wedding, I wanted to ride off in a sleigh. Me and my crazy ideas.  But it's hard to book a sleigh in advance in a place you can't predict whether there will be snow.  So I was settled on riding away in Dave's 1970 Cuda.
 Before we walked out, I even made sure to ask Dave to make sure I was able to get into the Cuda okay without falling and that my dress didn't get stuck in the door.
He gave me his assurance, and then we headed out through the candlelit crowd.

I was mostly focused on the ground, making sure to not slip on ice and hold my dress up. So when I finally did look up, I saw a horse drawn carriage waiting. It was such a fun surprise from Dave and his family, and still had the same feel that a sleigh would.
It was a 35 degree ride.  But I think the adrenaline kept us warm.  I didn't think about the cold one time.

And then we celebrated.  It's so fun thinking about all of our friends and family that were there with us that night.   Our reception was a beautiful mix of greenery, snow, ice, and white lights. With the perfect backdrop of real snow and ice out the wall of windows along one edge of the reception.

  I'm thankful to be so richly blessed with a husband who loves me beyond all of my faults.  The past 8 years I have learned so much about unconditional love.  Marriage is wonderful and hard and sweet and frustrating and so many other things, all wrapped into one relationship.  But I'm thankful that God put us together, to walk this life together, learning all along the way to not only love and serve each other, but to ultimately learn how to love and serve Him.

And to think it all began with a broken fork.  

last of the 2012 pictures {family time}

And just a little bit more from 2012... 

 

Our kids counted down all month for the day that their Michigan cousins would be here. Just about every waking hour they were here, we spent time at Nana and Papa's with them.

It took Gavin a few days to warm up to them. He definitely didn't just let them hold him and carry him around like he did last year and this summer.  But he got there slowly.

Had we had another week with them, they would have gotten to be best buds again like they were before.

 

 He found Jeremy's shoes and was trying to put them on himself.  When Jeremy sat down to help him, he was mesmorized by the big shoes that were on his feet.

 

 

There have been many hours of Legos.  Thanks Aunt Rebekah for the awesome race car set!

 And we spent an afternoon bowling.

(ha, ignore the fact that my settings were all over the place)

 

Mason was beating all the kids until the end.  I think he was throwing it harder than anyone.  He ran and threw with all his might, every time.

 

I about deleted this next one, because he's obviously out of focus.  But then I realized that it was when he got a strike, and it just made me smile, remembering how excited he was.

 

Poor Gavin wasn't feeling well at all.  So he just chilled most of the time of Papa's lap.

And this little neice of ours was quite entertaining to watch.  She had a different position, dance or jump that she ended every single throw with.

 

The kids had 3 slumber party nights in a row.  I think that may be a lot for any kid, but for sure a lot for a 4 and 6 year old.  And attitudes and behaviors were definitely hurting because of it.  But the cousin time and memories made are worth it.

 

We celebrated 2 Christmases, New Years Eve, and a birthday party, all in the few days that we got with our Michigan crew.

It sure has made this first week of January feel awful lonely and boring.

 

InstaFriday {December recap}

 

It feels like I just turned the calendar to December.  And now it's already a few days into January.

I've had the laziest, yuckiest start to the new year that I can ever remember. We got hit by sickness, the Christmas decorations are still up  (usually they go down the day after Christmas). I have work I've put off for weeks that I need to get to now.  And we are having a super hard time getting back into routine.  Can.not.get.out.of.bed.  No one. Maybe that's our fault for not staying on a good routine over the break. 

But the calendar is forcing us to get back to our normal.  The kids are back in school.  I start jewelry shows again soon.  And next week all of our activities start back again too.

I haven't thought one minute about goals or resolutions or desires for the year. Usually I am very reflective at the new year.

It is what it is though.

2013 is here whether I am ready or not.

 

So even though the calendar has flipped, here's a little of what our December looked like via Instagram.

 

 1. cutting down our tree  2. yummy pepper steak  3. christmas craft

4. mason rides the bus  5. school christmas program  6. best mail ever

7. light 'em up project  8. late night walmart escape in my slippers  9.  my morning buddy

 1. taylor washes the dishes   2. christmas bunting   3. love my kitchen with no walls

4.  my boys   5.  winter baby  6.  christmas card helpers

7.  more christmas bunting  8. chillin on mom's bed  9. family date night to sumo

 



 1. prayer partner gift exchange  2. caroling at the nursing home  3.  our caroling team

4. blessing bags for the homeless shelter  5.  kindergarten party treats  6.  polar express night with cousins

7.  rock paper scissors tournament  8.  sleeping under the christmas tree  9.  christmas day nap by the fire



1. christmas morning joys  2. legos and worship music  3. first time with a spoon

4. hours of hockey in the hall  5. their first OU shirts  6.  sweet airport homecoming

7.  new years eve buffet  8. celebratory drinks  9. happy new year

 

 

 

 

Hope you have a great weekend!  Mine will be GREAT - I'm off for a night away with a handsome man to celebrate 8 years together!  (I think this is our first night away together with no kids since Gavin was born!)